Holly Madison recalls body dysmorphia struggle during Playboy days: ‘I thought my thighs were huge’

Holly Madison recalls body dysmorphia struggle during Playboy days: 'I thought my thighs were huge'


Holly Madison is opening up about the effects body dysmorphia can have on one’s psyche.

The “The Girls Next Door” alum took to Tik Tok this week to share a body-positive message with her followers about how she used to obsess over her weight while living in the Playboy mansion.

While dressed in a casual t-shirt at home, Hugh Hefner’s former girlfriend informed viewers that she was trying to find a throwback picture of herself in a Playboy bunny costume. Madison ultimately shared a stunning photo of herself dressed in a black strapless satin corset and her long, platinum blonde curls falling past her shoulders.

Looking back at the old photo reminded the mother of two of the negative things she used to tell herself about her body, she said.

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V Personalities Holly Madison, Hugh Hefner, Bridget Marquardt and Kendra Wilkinson.
(Neilson Barnard/Getty Images)

“It reminded me of a moment in my life where I was watching a playback of myself in a fashion show and I thought, ‘Oh my God, I need to lose weight.’ And I’m sharing this because I think it might help people realize that sometimes our body dysmorphia is off the charts,” Madison said.

Madison insisted to her 1 million followers that being critical of oneself, especially when it comes to looks, can steal a person of their happiness.

“I really feel like worrying about what I look like has gotten in the way of me living my best life and being as happy as I could be and really enjoying life as much as I could. I hope that people can take a minute to think about how they think about their own body and is it holding you back by feeling bad about yourself?” she asked.

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The 41-year-old recalled her past fears of that very moment in the bunny costume.

“I looked at myself when I looked like this and was terrified and thought I had gained weight and thought that I hadn’t stuck to my diet and I thought my thighs were huge and thought I needed to lose five pounds at least,” she recalled.

Holly Madison in a Playboy bunny uniform designed by Roberto Cavalli.

Holly Madison in a Playboy bunny uniform designed by Roberto Cavalli.
(Denise Truscello/WireImage)

Madison now calls her past criticism of her body “ridiculous.”

“I look like a stick,” she said of the throwback photo.

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Madison is best known for her high-profile relationship with the late Playboy founder which was documented on the former reality series “Girl’s Next Door,” also starring Hefner’s exes Kendra Wilkinson and Bridget Marquardt.

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Madison later married and divorced Pasquale Rotella. They share two kids – Rainbow and Forest.



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